As he has been
reported spotted all around the world, in the most exotic occasions, he must be
a man of considerable means. Not to
mention he once paid an entire mall full of people to dress almost exactly as
he does. We’re talking Scrooge McDuck,
swim in your gold coins rich.
Seeing that he has been spotted throughout history he must
be either an immortal that has conquered the secrets of time and space. Or he is from the future with the only time
machine in existence. Either way, safe
to assume the level of the man’s intellect must be the equivalent of an
Einstein, Newton, and Hawking in one candy striped lurp.
He has surrounded himself with a cult like following that
dresses almost identical to himself. Are
these willing-to-drink-the-kool-aid followers just an extension of his façade?
Or perhaps Waldo is a schizophrenic who personality has fragmented multiple
times. If we are going to consider a
mental disorder then possibly nobody is looking for him and paranoia is just a
symptom.
It frightens me that we all so mindlessly jumped on board in
this pursuit. Brain washing? Subliminal messaging? Mind Control?
The unorthodox approach to his capture and his lack of an appearance on
America’s Most Wanted, leads me away from a government man hunt and more resembles
the tracking methods of a secret society.
Perhaps his capture should be our top priority. How do we know Waldo is plotting the
destruction of the world? Possibly even space and time itself?
Who was Waldo before all this? Maybe another son of Krpton? A wizard? A reincarnate buddy of the Dalai
Lama’s aware of his many lives with life times of wisdom? A wronged youth,
forever jaded and constantly trying to bring down the man? A secret agent who has trained Bond, Hunt,
and Bourne? Perhaps a computer programmer
unaware of his abilities and recruited by Carmen Sandiego?
Too many speculations have been made, and far too many similarities
exist to not include Carmen Sandiego in this discussion. My theory is that they are married and
together safe guard whatever secret that they are being hunted for. It does concern me that these days nobody
seems to be carrying on this search?
Have the powers that be finally given up? Too many men lost and too many resources
expended? Or have they been caught? Being
tortured in dark, dank dungeon?
For their sakes hopefully they have retired on the same tropical
island Chris Farley, Tupac, Michael Jackson, and Heath Ledger have fled
too. Maybe they even started a family
and are continuing their empire producing “I Spy…” books. Perhaps the clues to where and what their
secret are, are hidden in the those pages…